There’s a whole world down there
Down where? I’ll tell you where
Right under your feet where the land and plants meet
It’s the Soil Food Web and it’s a bangin’ good time
Come on down underground and meet some friends of mine

I’m flatulent, I mean, a flagellate!
I've got this whippy tail, can you imagine it?
I got a motion promotion in the primordial ocean
To get me swimmin around, now I’m smashing it!

I’m Amoeba, I’m a-you-ba
A shapeshifter
Look, I’m a tuba!
I slip around like a blob doing my job
And sometimes I’m slime-mould with the mob

I’m the Arch-Nemetode, you get bad rap
When you’re nothin but a tube that moves and unattractive
Not a villain, just a bit of killin’ with four hundred quintillion siblings
What’s wrong with that?
Fungus saprophyte
And Bacteria’s back, alright!

They be eating and breeding and moving dancing and creeping
It’s like a party going on right under your nose
If you know some folks with a microscope
Get ‘em to show you the ropes and check the life below

It’s the soil food web
What?
Get it in your head
And your garden bed
Alright!
The soil food web
Huh?
That’s what I said
And it’s how we’re fed

Come and take a ride on the nutrient cycle
It’s always breaking down, but that’s what it’s like yo!
It’s kind of the point! If it didn’t pretty soon
We’d have junk piled up all the way to the moon!
Don’t let anyone tell you that compost ain’t boss
Without it life would stop
Like, actually
So cover the soil with mulch, shade and plants
And discover the joy of the soil food web dance

It’s the soil food web
What?
Get it in your head
And your garden bed
Alright!
The soil food web
Huh?
That’s what I said
And it’s how we’re fed